Wednesday, 29 February 2012

I liked him so much more before he let his mask slip

Again this is based on an emotional response to a situation in my life, and i'm sure many other  peoples lives. I've noticed that often in life and especially in 'love' people put their best mask on and pretend to be someone and something that will never hurt you, but over time everyones mask slips and leaves the other person feeling like the bewildered little lamb, wondering 'who is this person i said i loved?'

I haven't used any backgroud on this image as i wanted people to focus on the characters and nothing more. I didn't want a background to detract from this. Also i feel that characters situation is meant to give a feeling of bewilderment and isolation , i feel a white background amplifies this feeling of bewilderment , you feel so lost at this sudden reveal, the person you thought you loved wasn't real at all, it was just a mask, just another lie.

I dont think so!

Another day another heartache.
Sometimes I feel like i want to cry, and dwell upon situations. This piece was done after my mother tolled me,, ''You may feel horrible about what has happened, and you are justified to feel sad about it, because it was wrong, but, just like fred and Ginger sang in swing time,, you have to 'pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again,, you need to dress and look fabulous and show people exactly what they are missing, even if you feel like dying inside, you can't let people know that''  And she was right, you can  never show people your weakness, this piece was a reaction to that. I felt angry and hurt by peoples hurtful words and actions, all of which i did not deserve. I'd like people to look at these characters and relate to them , and if just one person takes this 'advice' and meaning, then i will feel very happy.

Again i haven't used any background as i feel the characters are strong enough on their own and i didnt want to detract from this.

Lost to the waves

 It was beautiful until just like the tide his love was washed away and lost to the sea

Monday, 27 February 2012


I've loved Niagara's work for a long time , although it looks nothing like my work it does influence me in its sheer element of femme fetale attitude, whitch i think every girl needs to adopt at some point in her life, i love her strong characters and witty one liners, her work always makes me smile and i love the use of bright colours, it looks 'trashy' but in the most amazing way possible.

(Tara Mcpherson)

Its all screen printed, its all about loss and heartache, it's all very appealing to me !

(Laurie Lipton)

I like the haunting atmosphere Lipton creates in her work, her drawing skills amaze me, i do have a soft spot for realistic drawing. Again she is macabre and witty, often depicting lifless mourners around coffins holding radient angelic (very much alive) beautiful women.

(Katie Jane Garside) Darling They Found The Body

''they drag the canal, i swim with birds, here is my stone dress ...''

Katie Jane Garside has always been one of my favourite performers, Mainly for her singing but also for her performance art. Again her work , both musical and performance is dark ,moody, full of emotion, angst and heartache. Darling they found the body was a series of photographs of Garside, depicted i feel as a woman on the edge, fragile yet strong but still tipping over into insanity. She has always created these worlds through all of her work, magical yet real, an emotional landslide at times but still very raw and beautiful. I only hope that Garside continues with her performance art as well as her musical career, i felt that this exibition was raw, and fresh, i think a lot of people are afraid to show that 'crazy' side, but raw emotion is something i feel very commected to, although i dont do the same thing in the same way as Garside in my personal work , i feel that i still have that raw emotion that the brings out in all her work, this is why i feel so heavily influenced by her and also her lyrics.

(Roman Dirge)

Ever since i was a teenager Roman Dirge and his bizare and darkly beautiful creepy little tales of a dead girl named Lenore and her companions, Raggamuffin, Taxidermy, Muffin man and many a dead kitty have kept me smiling through a lot. They have everything in them that makes my heart feel a little less burdened. There  are references to Poe, (who i must say is a poet i find myself obsessed by) There are many a story of unrequited love with a character called Mr Gosh and lots of other creepy ,sad yet witty little tales. Dirge has also created other comics and short illustrated stories such as The Monsters In My Tummy,, a charmingly dark poem about a heart been broken and all the good and bad feelings battling it out inside your body (all depicted as macabre characters). Although his work is rather dark and macabre it does make me laugh an awful lot and again makes me feel like i'm not so alone in the things i feel and think.

(Edward Gorey)

Childlike, dark and beautiful. Edward Gorey is witty and grim needless to say he appeals very much so to me.

(Annelie carlstrom)

I fell in love with Carlstroms work as soon as i was introduced to her. I love the skill and realism in her work but how it is juxtaposed with its dissproportionate features and bodies. I like how fun yet seriuos her work appears, it is one huge contradiction but i feel this works, its unusual and becautiful.

(Riitta Ikonen)

I love the way Ikonen mixes performance, costume and art to create such beautiful and sometimes bizare works. I've never seen anything like this and find it delightful that there is someone in the world who thinks '' you know what, today i'm going to dress up as a suitcase, or a snowflake who has missed the snow, or a gigantic worm in the woods'' i think she is fantastic and am so glad i was tolled of her work.


I'm not sure who did this , or what exactly it was used for , all i know is that i like it. I'm sure everyone has been lied to in their lives, lies whitch cause much pain and sorrow and make us all feel like fools. To have someone write the word LIE in huge lights, makes me feel like i'm not so alone in this feeling.

(Natalie Shau)

I'd never heard of Natalie Shau before but came across this piece whilst looking for other artists who specialised in anthrapamorphism. It has eveything i'm interested in, Victorian costume, animal heads and broken hearts, isn't that what life is all about?

(Mark Ryden)

Mark Ryden has been one of my favourite artists for many years now. Again ,as with previous influences, I am fond of his melancholy style, and depiction of weeping girls, small innocent looking characters and sad stories. I love the way, at first glance or from a far his pictures look 'cute' and perhaps like something you may see in a childrens story book, but on closer inspection you find children are actually weeping blood , bunnies are cutting girls open to remove their organs and the world you are peeing into is only sugar coated as on the inside it is rather dark and disturbing indeed.

(Mark Ryden)

forcefully happy

For no more can i wake, with a smile upon my face,
No. now it must be plastered, pinned, drawn and sewn to keep it in place.
I must create the faulse security of a happiness potrayed upon my face, whilst inside i am surely dead.

forced smiles

When i was asked to produce a  smile a week, i though, i really don't feel like producing a smile a year at this very  moment. So i thought, if i had to produce these smiles , they would have to be forced. I was listening to a song at the time in which there is a line,, ''Pin a smile on my face and build a fortress round my heart'' At the time I found this very apt and so decided to literally 'pin a smile on my face'. Of course i didn't actually pin my face i used my knowledge of makeup and prosthetics, love of the macabre and theatrical.

Sometimes pinning a smile on is the only way.

Sunday, 26 February 2012

Pin a smile on my face

How i wouldd dearly love to smile, but i feel so tired and used again, so pins will have to do to create this faulse asthetic happyness.

dolly day

This began as the forced smile project Olivia and I were working on, but then turned into something else as well as forced smiles. We both have a love for the macabre and both like the asthetic of dolls, so it seemed natural to put the two together and create some more images.

Sunday, 19 February 2012



(Nicoletta Ceccoli)

I descovered nicoletta Ceccoli a couple of years ago when a friend brought me a post card back from Paris with one of her illustrations on, saying that this reminded her of me. the image was a menancholy looking  half spider half girl. I took this as a complement. From then i looked into her work and found that she has illustrated a lot of books, mainly childrens books with macabre stories in them. I love her work because although it is dark in its theme, it is presented in a rather innocent way. When i look at her work it reminds me of when i was a little girl sat reading my books and drawing , it gives me the same sence of security i had when i was a little girl, yet its mingled with the insecurities and sadness of growing up and living in the real world where things aren't quite as magical as they should be or might have seemed when you were a little girl. I think this mix of childhood security and happiness spliced with sadness and reality potrayed in Ceccoli's work is all part of the overwhelming charm of the worlds she creates.

(trevor Brown)

I must admit that Trevor Brown has been a bit of a guilty pleasure of mine for a long time. I think he is one of the type of artists that you either love or hate. A lot of his work, infact all of his work is extreamly pornographic, usually  potraying , what seem to be young 'doll like' girls often battered and bruised in various promiscuous situations. Is this wrong? probabelly. i know a lot of people feel his work is quite sick but maybe thats the point , i still like it, well the majority, some of his ink drawings are far too vile for my liking, depicting extream bondage and various bodily fluids, thats a bit too far for me, but the sickly cute doll like images, although i admit they are extreamly perverted do interest and even inspire me. I think that the risk and 'sickening' element in them is all part of their appeal, you know you should be discusted , but parts of it are cute and pretty, so you find yourself strangely compelled by his images. I mean the man even illustrated alice in wonderland and put a pornographic stint on it.

(Liz Mcgrath)

Liz Mcgrath has been one of my favourite artists for many years now. I adore her use of creepy characters and macabre ceramic and taxidermied animals. Although im not sure if i agree with using dead animals for art, but i do really love the work she creates, i do feel a little wrong for that. Still her characters and 3d sets are a constant inspiration for my own work , although i will never ever be using taxidermy myself.

Albert was upto his old tricks again


jeremy the cat

Jeremy the cat


I recently descovered this wonderful mexican artist named Valfre. I absolutly fell in love with her work as soon as i saw it. I love the innocence of her style and the bitter sweet typography used to sum up the general feeling of the drawing. Its witty and quite maudlin in places but i feel becauase of its innocence and senserity that this is why it particularly appeals to me,, obviously the fact that some of the words and feelings relate to me and i suppose most people in this world does also help.

(Robert morgan)

A fiew weeks ago i was looking on 'itsnicethat' and i descovered an artist named Robert Morgan. I remember seeing his 'The cat with hands' animation many years ago and it was something that has stuck with me until this day, i could never remember the name of the artist and so needless to say i was delighted when his portfolio poped up on its nice that. As i viewed his other animations and art work i began to like his macabre vision of the word, or at least the worlds he creates through his work. There is a strong sence of melancholy and loss throughout all of his work. A feeling of nervousness and unease, a feeling that the world seems quite cruel and that nothing ever really has a happy ending, but despite all of this grim representation there is a certain charm, innocence and tenderness about his work that i feel works beautifully together. if you are interested in the macabre then i would definatly recomend you look at Robert morgans work.

Friday, 10 February 2012


The fact that she had fallen in love only made things harder, much harder than they would have been if  she hadn't given out another slice of her heart to someone she could never be all too sure about. Her problem was and had always been that she gave so much of herself to others, and never got anything in return, constantly giving all she had and never receaving anything, or very little had finally begun to take its tole. She felt lifeless and joyless. The world was grey and all hope was clouded in black smog.

Thursday, 9 February 2012

the lonely mermaid

cat litter

I thought it would last forever, but nice things seldom do.
I thought a heart could only break two thousand times, and could be fixed with super glue.
i thought if i carried on sticking and sticking, and padding up the holes with cat litter that it might soak up all the pain, but instead it just felt gritty and dirty like a cheap carrier bag with too many bottles of milk inside bursting at the seams, cutting your hands and sacrificing your milk to the gods of the pavement.
I thought it could last forever, but glimmers of hope are cheap
I thought a heart could only throb so many times before it eventually died,,
but now i have this rotten lump of glue, cat litter and a thousend empty dreams.
I thought that  i could fix myself, but i have proven myself wrong.

the lonely mermaid

The lonely mermaid

There once was a mermaid living deep in the sea, whos only wish was to feel happy.
Now deep in the ocean all mermaids are born, from a pearl and some seaweed wrapped up in a ball.
Their hearts are removed and taken away, to a secret reef guarded by the octupai.

Most mermaids are happy and gay and free, but this little mermaid just could not be, although she had everything that most did not have, she felt something missing, she called this her 'sad' she  could not quite place just why she felt blue, but had heard of a place where things called 'hearts' grew.

So awayshe swam to a forbidden land rulled by the octopus, who she'd heard had eight hands! Her friends called her crazy, "stay here and play" but she did not heed and just swam away.
Many wise sea folk warned "STOP, STAY AWAY!" but onward she swam, far, far away until she came to the land where they 'did' have eight hands.

Every hand held a weapon to guard this new 'thing' she swam super careful, not sure what they'd bring, but she found them quite gentle in a perculiar way.
They sang as they spoke, a song of olden days, when mermaids had hearts that always seemed to break. Each word brought new tears to each octopus eye
"Dont keep them too long for no good can come from a heart gone wrong"
They sang and they sang and were blinded by tears.

But this little mermaid indignant and strong, coveted these 'hearts' even if they had gone wrong. She swam through the reef until she came to her name,, Octavia Rose
Clasping both sides she tugged hard and true, until this thing called a heart gave off a strange red hue. The next thing she knew there came a pain in her chest.
Not used to this weight she began to cry, although momenterily she did feel happy inside. Under the weight of this new joy the mermaid swam home unaware that all that lie ahead was nothing but greaf.

Full of glee at first, the mermaid twirled with joy and would dance on top of the ocean to entice the pretty boys. But soon there came a grumble from deep within her chest, just been in there wasn't enough, and it demanded to be fed.
So she took on many 'a' lover and tried to do her best, but each boy took a slice of 'it' and just left her feeling depressed.

As blue as she had ever felt she'd never felt this dark, she tried to pull the last slice out but found it far too hard.
As the mermaid lay there dying she finally understood that hearts were just a waste of time and did noone any good.

So if you read this story and are curious about love, remember this lonely mermaid and that hearts should only be used to pump blood!

The great stag rises

haunted forest doe

the haunted forest

Malinka had collected precisely ten thousand broken dreams, each time believing that this dream could survive. Every broken promise she placed inside a locket and dwell't upon each with maudlin regret, regret that each dream had never come true and never would, still Malikna continued to collect every lie she had been fed, she placed every miss trust deep within her cabinet of broken dreams and filed every horrid word that had ever been said to her. The feelings of loneliness had a huge box of their own on the top shelf and  the broken hearts had taken up two entire shelves. She knew she should clear away all of these feelings and not squash them up inside, but as long as she had them, she felt safe from the outside.